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Captain Marvel: An Unbridled Meh

MauLer
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Well, it looks as if the MCU has out done itself, like this ended up being double the length of the normal rant breakdowns but there is so much to lay out, hope you enjoy it folks ;) /

Gaming

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Apr 18, 2019

RantRagespoilersdiscussionmoviesfilmsreviewAngryloreDeathterribleworstawfulThescriptassessmentbadmehsighboringbrielarsoncaptainmarvelmcucinematicuniverse

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Comments 16 656
MauLer
MauLer 4 months ago
The rudimentary research into space travel at light speed, amounts of solar systems and planets and all that is totally something I recommend people look into to get more accurate numbers, I just did a few google searches with Fringy and checked a couple of websites. It seems I might have underestimated the distances and made a few mistakes that makes it all seem smaller than it is but that would only make the overall point more relevant; Light speed just aint gonna cut it, not by a long shot when it comes to travelling between galaxies.
Learning Thru The Insanity
Agreed i have a phd in physics and. Saw the movie and when the said thats what they were doing i laughed because the have ships that travel like in GG. Its like building a jet then deciding its better to use a row boat. Fucking dumb. Good video. Way better than the movie. Every timed she smiled it totally felt like it was reshot and was just creepy. Why because she wasnt smiling at appropriate times.
TigerBloodMan
TigerBloodMan 2 days ago
I never saw this piece of shit.
Joshua Garner
Joshua Garner 9 days ago
@zoompt 1975 a light year is the distance light travels in 1 year, the galaxy is 100s of thousands of lights years across so no you can't travers the galaxy in a couple years
Joshua Garner
Joshua Garner 9 days ago
@Adam Price correct our Voyager probe still hasn't found the end of our solar system
Charlie Gareginyan
Charlie Gareginyan 11 days ago
You've probably gotten this question before but is there anywhere to go where we can see DishonouredWolf's/Word-of-Wolf's reviews and videos since he took down his channel (and just about all the other social media he had that I was aware of).
Tripa
Tripa 3 hours ago
"Dont go see this movie it's really bad..." Yeah i wish you had warned me sooner
Oliver North
Oliver North 5 hours ago
Small penis white dudes soooo angry lmao
Burgess Meredith
Burgess Meredith 6 hours ago
Now that we know Disney may have been cookin the books the billion dollars they said this movie made becomes pretty fuckin suspect as well. The sold blocks of tickets in empty theaters that many noticed makes sense when disney can just write off the loss with a couple shady accountants and a sinister laugh from Bob Igar.
Clive David
Clive David 9 hours ago
Captain Plank, she's 👋 my 👋 hero 👋
Nathan Rogers
Nathan Rogers 10 hours ago
I'm going to call her plank for now on
Nathan Rogers
Nathan Rogers 10 hours ago
this movie makes my brain hurt
Collin I
Collin I 12 hours ago
Stan Lee is GOD you dumb fook. Lesson in love. His comics are his lessons in love. Shmuck. Come on.
Hakan Karaağaç
Hakan Karaağaç 12 hours ago
if you cover yourself with light speed engine goo, you will get light speed engine powers. if you cover yourself with car oil, you will get car engine powers.... Right?
Gkang 21
Gkang 21 16 hours ago
I think the color changing suit is for camoflouge i think idk fuck it
shineryyy
shineryyy 19 hours ago
I need to know what the naked man at stonehenge scene is from?.
Doctor Virtual
Plank from Ed, Edd and Eddy is more fun to watch than this plank Carol Danvers.
Chris Kayy
Chris Kayy Day ago
Tbh, I dont know why people are complaining so much, just be happy you're even getting marvel movies man. Why does everyone have to be so negative. If you think you can do better then create a better captain marvel movie. I'll wait.
Spicy Chicken Marsala Cucumber Salad w/ Pico
Fuckin fuck you bitch
Dhondu Rao
Dhondu Rao Day ago
I think this video is a better captain marvel. You only had to wait 3 hours.
GalaxyDogenut
4:25 You go girl! Don’t listen to the mean boy, you speed up! *Crashes*
Caitlin Long
Caitlin Long Day ago
idk why so many men have such a problem with her. but honestly? it speaks volumes
Arjun Sidhan
Arjun Sidhan Day ago
Her as in Bree Larson or Carol 'plank' Denvers? In the movie all her rise up moments are shown as an opressed woman rising against tyranny of patriarchy, but it feels forced especially in MCU. This could've made sense if Peggy Carter from first captain America had been descriminated in such way but she managed to navigate around those challenges easily. Lil' Carol crashes her car and it's patriarchy's fault? Carol is the last one hanging on the ropes her fellow male cadets already cleared successfully and when she falls it's somehow patriarchal pressure? She comes across someone with a chip on their shoulders when it comes to her brand of feminism and that's just plank from the movie. Real life Bree is worse.
Jennifer A
Jennifer A Day ago
She feels like one of those robots from World End.
Jennifer A
Jennifer A Day ago
I think they should have had a last goodbye to Stan Lee in Endgame as it's the end of fase 3 and is one of the most anticipated movies of the MCU.
Jacob Schiller
(Radical feminist satire) You know something? If Captain Marvel doesn't win Best Picture and Best Actress at the Academy Awards, I will take it upon myself to sue the whole Academy of Motion Pictures Arts and Sciences for sexism!!
Jacob Schiller
Captain Marvel IS alike to a wooden plank. You don't feel totally emotionally affected if it/she is burning up, but at least you're going to stay warm for a few hours.
Nomads cheap-n-nerdy!
Dude 2 million views...I remember where this went live...
Petaboii - Drums
Petaboii - Drums 2 days ago
I haven’t watched it despite watching 98% of all marvel movies. Probably won’t.
Petaboii - Drums
Petaboii - Drums 2 days ago
I haven’t watched it despite watching 98% of all marvel movies. Probably won’t.
OptimisticCynic715
@19:47 - Is that "The Cat From Outer Space"?
OptimisticCynic715
I haven't watched Captain Marvel yet, but I'm pretty sure this review is more entertaining. I guess CM will be on TV sometime.
Corporal Shepard
Corporal Shepard 3 days ago
Redeeming qualities: 1. Stan lee cameo 2. The Don
Wesley Edwards
Wesley Edwards 3 days ago
Agreed!! So much potential, so poorly executed
Dauren Hill
Dauren Hill 3 days ago
The importance of the tesseract powered engine, aside from being an infinity stone, is that unlike other means of travel that tack time no matter the speed. It would allow for instant teleportation and a sure fire way of escaping any enemy.
Lunartic
Lunartic Day ago
But the movie explains it as a light speed engine and not as a instant teleport.
Robert Lloyd
Robert Lloyd 3 days ago
Krennec hahahaha
Jerome Bellon
Jerome Bellon 3 days ago
"How did they develop a nicotine patch that limits the tesseract-originated powers?" "Why give her the patch if it only works as long as she thinks it does?" One word: Placebo. That could actually work in real-life... provided the rest of the story is consistent. The problem is this other question: "why would they give the super-powers instead of a random actual kree soldier, younguldore for example?"
Shaun Train
Shaun Train 3 days ago
Thank you, thank you, thank you. I did not want to watch this movie. But, it is quite entertaining to read reviews and listen to people on USvid and social media discussing and dissecting the work. I did like Plank's hair.
Gerhard Venter
Gerhard Venter 3 days ago
Okay MauLer you obviously didn't see that this plot hole (01:09:27) is easily filled. You see, because she is channeling the powers of Almighty God she was actually giving that ship a push start at lightspeed. /s
Chooch
Chooch 4 days ago
Imagine how ridiculous this movie would look and especially how Brie's acting would look without the CGI fire-effects.
Jonathan
Jonathan 4 days ago
Thought: Did the Red Skull disintegrate others? If they were using the Tesseract, wouldn't that mean the victims were simply teleported elsewhere?
Lunartic
Lunartic Day ago
But they only used the Tesseract as a power source.
Critical Mass
Critical Mass 5 days ago
I heard that Brie Larson and Natalie Portman are competing in their next films to see which one gets to play the actual wooden plank in the next Pirates of the Caribbean movie. Will they walk the Brie or walk the Natalie?
myrs4
myrs4 5 days ago
A totally unnecessary movie, that caused Dark Phoenix to amend its plot. If only......
lncarnold
lncarnold 5 days ago
My God! It’s a movie! It’s fun and fantasy! Do you hate puppies and Christmas too?
OptimisticCynic715
It's like the makers aren't even trying though. It's just noise and lights, empty payoffs with no build up.
Swell Guy
Swell Guy 5 days ago
You were scarily accurate with that captain plank saving tony in endgame prediction
Enkhe Bathsaihan
Enkhe Bathsaihan 5 days ago
This "weird acting", I would say emotionless facial expressions, in other words, no emotion whatsoever, is in fact became a thing in action films this days
Moodymongul
Moodymongul 6 days ago
It annoyed me they gave us an ester egg in the form of miss Marvel (her US military friend), the fact that Brie got the main character of 'captain marvel'. just annoyed me more (I think the other actress would have been a better 'Marvel'). I would have preferred if they did a miss marvel movie ..instead of a movie that had to retcon the male captain marvel into a female captain marvel (and all the awkward name jokes, in the movie, that grew from that fact and the DC universe captain marvel). Although, it has been quite amusing watching all these 'supposed' politically correct movies of late. As they seem to be eroding the very thing they claim to be promoting (imo - its comes across as just shallow virtue signalling ..as opposed to meaningful change). I mean ..in years to come; imagine a world dumb enough to call new ghostbusters a 'feminist' movie! What an insult to feminism .. Germaine Greer (a real feminist) would not approve. ;)
DinoTheRuler
DinoTheRuler 6 days ago
1:02:03 because of this, Captain Marvel let Ronan killed an entire army of Nova Corp. You go girl!
Shane Meredith
Shane Meredith 6 days ago
Your title pretty much sums up how I felt after seeing the movie. I didn't analyze my feelings or the movie in depth because I came away not caring about it at all. But great god almighty I absolutely hate this movie now after seeing your review. I only made it through 45 minutes because I just became numb from the sheer multitude of things you pointed out, and you didn't repeat yourself hardly at all. I may watch the rest of your review later, but most probably I won't. I'm going to go now and look for some random writer to punch in the face.
TrainerblueTube
TrainerblueTube 6 days ago
idc if no one reads this but I'm rewriting that scene that she gets her powers from: Marvel is out with her science friend, testing the piece of alien tech with their regular jets, however, they are tracked by youngeldore and are sent a transmission with two choices, they surrender the light speed engine and walk away, or be shot down and have it taken by force, her science friend says that they should just give it up, and escape with their lives. Marvel chooses instead to activate the light speed function to escape despite her science friend's warnings. The jet however is not commutable (idk can't be used with) the light speed engine, and it explodes, killing her friend instantly and giving her powers (the explosion would be short range and it would be the radiation that gives her powers) the explosion would also strip her of her memory, so when youngeldore finds her, he will notice that she has powers and would make a good addition to their army. Marvel would then, throughout the movie, hear (Instead of "control your emotions you wahman") about her recklessness and until her memory is recovered, she will have feelings of guilt that she won't be able to explain. Or, if the emotions thing would really be what the writers want, when she hears about her recklessness, she could go into a crying fit, or anger, and her powers would go out of control, leading to villains taking advantage of this and friends trying to help her with it.
Angel Diez Ovelar
This will be a sad one Min. 8 I'm out
dreamisolympia88
dreamisolympia88 7 days ago
Right up there with last jedi. Best review possible tho.
Natalia Dziedzicka
Funny fact? I actually enjoyed that film in the cinema. But man, you did manage to change my perspective with your analysis. More credits to you my good man, more credits to you.
Roger Eisnaugle
Roger Eisnaugle 7 days ago
I had a thought. I could not imagine Superman, or Iron Man, or Thor, or Spiderman, maybe the Hulk, but anyone deliberately destroying someone's property just to prove who they are. Is that really how women view the "Patriarchy?" How do I know you are the Batman? Someone needs to move the car with the fins out front or they're going to get a ticket. Sorry officer, it was on follow.
nar whal
nar whal 7 days ago
Johnny 2x4 gunna be pissed he didn't get a cut.
Wyzai
Wyzai 7 days ago
50:50 and this is why you don't integrate everything into one central system with no backups.
Wyzai
Wyzai 7 days ago
"Science skrol" is the real hero here. Constructing an entire spaceship in one night from scrap metal is some serious engineering.
Wyzai
Wyzai 7 days ago
35:15 That's something I see done a lot nowadays. People write shitty scripts and then point out their own mistakes in jokes. Should we be worried these creatures are in fact the alien invaders disguised as humans and pretending to understand human behavior?
BringBackMy90s
BringBackMy90s 7 days ago
Why are modern films always so ugly, can't watch the CGI crap
Sulaymaan Kingseed
say no more. this movie is shit.
james bond
james bond 8 days ago
WAT IS TIS YOU DONT SUPPORT WAHMAN...WAHMAN GREAT MAHN BAD...USvid BAN.....this marvel "film" is the most God awful 2 hour propaganda to attack men...btw great vid
KAOS NATION
KAOS NATION 8 days ago
Black Widow movie is on the way AFAIK and it will be made by some wahman who made some TV shows in the past... She has never shown she can make a superhero movie and she came right out of the gate talking feminism... It will be garbage. 100% guaranteed.
KAOS NATION
KAOS NATION 8 days ago
1:39:00 on the third "'keeey" i spit coffee all over my desk from bursting out laughing...!
Janice Columbus
Janice Columbus 8 days ago
52:33 "What the fuck is happening?" The question we repeatedly asked each other through the entire movie. Boring flashbacks, combined with lllogical plot twists. Just a bad film.
Zokes The Cat
Zokes The Cat 8 days ago
Brie Landon is a god damn dirty cunt
Matthew Parker
Matthew Parker 8 days ago
is not the dead scroll behind project tahiti?
Sebastian Cruxian
Project Tahiti was a Kree alien
dragonoyxd
dragonoyxd 9 days ago
U actually talked shit longer than the movie itself xD dafaq?
OptimisticCynic715
Mr. Plinkett, what hath thou wrought?
Arvas Dreven
Arvas Dreven 9 days ago
Yeah, and it better than the actual movie. Lol
James Castro
James Castro 9 days ago
Bro! I thought this was gonna be a podcast! Its 2 hours long! LMFAO! You either HATED this movie, or you LOVED it! How else to explain 2 hours!! But yea I agree with you: this shit was awful!
evilbanana _
evilbanana _ 10 days ago
Those clips of her from the room weren't that impressive lol
evilbanana _
evilbanana _ 10 days ago
Captain Marvel is just Quarian propaganda
Tom Varrette
Tom Varrette 11 days ago
Starlight from "the boys" is 10000000% better than capt failure. aka brie the cheese maker
KonsciousKoonKiller 22
Plank
superkami guru
superkami guru 11 days ago
When was the last time you saw a female hero say "I don't want any trouble" and try and avoid a fight? Because I have seen plenty of male heroes do that.
Brian Charles
Brian Charles 11 days ago
Thank god feminist woke hollywood has decided that plot/character development/story/motivation/..errr, acting..../and logic isn't needed in movies anymore!! Saves so much time with stupid writing stuff; it all gets in the way of the studios telling everyone that women are awesome and men are shit! yay!
FenrirWolf44
FenrirWolf44 11 days ago
giant ship blowing up with debris that would make earth more technologically advanced screw Tony creating a new element with the help of Howard, there would probably a lot in any small pieces. Rocket said to Tony that he's only smart on Earth. Probably because of the limitations of what materials they can use.
Artsy Ork
Artsy Ork 12 days ago
Id rather be stuck in a cell with ultron .. nuff said
Jai Cilento I Love That Guy ʕ•ᴥ•ʔߛ ̋
☼ nah, it's really good.
SaraKpn
SaraKpn 12 days ago
A woman refers to female HUMAN. Marvel is not a woman. Feminism fail.
Red Comet
Red Comet 12 days ago
It’s actually fascinating that every other Marvel movie had better continuity than this one
Sam Tetroien Nimley
i wonder what captain marvel's friend mean when she said " you supported me as a other when know one else would". She has Dad and Mom. they even came in the movie to support her as a mother and take care of her daughter for her while she went in space. Excluding her parents, did anyone really refuse to help her as a mother. All the nannies and nurseries she tried refuse to help her. The store owners wouldn't sell her any mothering books. Maybe she should have opened her social circle so there would be other people besides captain marvel to support her.
B briggs
B briggs 8 days ago
Glad to see someone else noticed this
Console MonsterX
Console MonsterX 13 days ago
This movie was just "We need feminism to be the most important thing now because all of the fans hate it so we need to ruin this franchise just like Star Wars".
Sam Tetroien Nimley
7:00 they also did that joke in the first thor movie
Jay Teranova
Jay Teranova 13 days ago
It's Disney man. They're ruining EVERYTHING
Mr. Wrong
Mr. Wrong 13 days ago
She does save Tony which kinda fucks up the fact I wanted to see Tony save himself like in Ironman 2008.....and quite frankly she puts flaws in endgame as well that are WAY distracting. Why didn't she do the snap? How did she know to come back to earth? Why didn't she go on the time heist? Why did she need ANY female avengers in the A force shot at the end when she just power drills through everything? She fucks up more than she helps continuity wise
Starkill3r 306
Starkill3r 306 13 days ago
What a big middle finger to Black Widow, even for their first female lead shot she isn’t in it, despite being the first badass female character in the MCU that is loved by everyone.
Esej Snake
Esej Snake 14 days ago
51:50 I laughed until I cried.
Esej Snake
Esej Snake 14 days ago
Imagine: Jude Law: Stay put. Plank: Yes SIR! Changes her suit to a generic jumper and pants and goes to a bar, sits herself down, discoveres she has no money. Curses. But there is music playing and she starts to hum. She has a vague flashback. Nick Fury sitting on the bar stool next to her: Not bad! Now shut up. They talk for the next half hour (when the barman comes, Fury buys her a drink), they get to know each other, but then the Aliens attack in disguise. She destroyed their ship and they are furious. They tracked her somehow. She can't use her powers, so she fights normally. Fury tries to help. Jude Law walks in shortly dressed in earth clothes and finishes the fight (captures two and kills one). Jude Law's underlings pretend to be the special force and reason with the barman. Fury sees one of the shapeshifters before he is taken out. Jude: We are going. Plank (to Fury): Yeah, thanks, bye. Fury: Come on! You can't leave me like this! Jude Law: You're coming with us. Movie continues.
Anjam Beary
Anjam Beary 14 days ago
better than the movie
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